Tax Day Cllitfo Update, April 15 2010

Litfo has been more functional lately. The trolls are laughable & the writing has been decent. Today's News Flash Fiction has been rockin' the daily news and unspinning the spin. Good satire.

There were the typical kids who don't really believe they're posting on the internet--until they get their first 'unkind' comment. Then we have to watch them freak out when they're forced to deal with reality for what seems like the first time.

Zenyatta wrote some poetry that was okay in form, but not really memorable.

I don't read much wonderfulone but playman sure did and gave him/her the seal of approval. Not for me, but who wants a monolithic literary taste. Artcrime anyone?

A schizo named crimson something is trolling like it's 1994. It would be pathetic if it wasn't so ridiculous.

pdxink has grown up and can accept criticism now. There wasn't even a flamewar when spittingseasnake failed to get part of pdxink's comp on the 10th.

There was some forgettable 'chamber music' poetry that was pretty to read (for the right type I suppose) but really lacked anything memorable.

Oh, the violence-porn. Can't forget that stuff. So you know, violent fantasies, played out in a what-if scenario. Not necessarily wish-fulfillment, but the sort of morbid curiosity a child has. Not very interesting.

Oh, this guy called TheRailsplitter writes these dozen or so line poems that rhyme and use iambs, but can be summarized in five words or less. I called him on it and he tried to play it cool--ye olde, 'you loser' rebuttal. Truth hurts, eh buddy?

Royo liked someone's trite vacation poetry. That guy is the living performance art of fail. Here is some typical Royo for you:

I read the first two posts, got interested < royo > 04/11 22:07:13

then decided you are playing games
with the forum trolls, you
should try for a better audience
with a straightforward ms
unless you just want you ass kissed
by ass kissers

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=155925494

Someone asked about Nu Shu, one of those matrilineal languages. China I think. Bloomsday was helpful as usual. I regret being a jerk to him/her for a few years. Goes to show that s/he's interested in talking lit, not 'making friends' as they say on reality shows.

It's well known on litfo that I'm a big fan of rtoady's writing. He really outdid himself this week with "AH-64: Ouroboros Drags His Talons Through the Dust." If you were freaked out by the wikileaks video, you weren't the only one. It's on the first page of http://carrioncall.blogspot.com and you should definitely get over your anti-blog prejudices and read it. He also has some great sketches on there--he's been doing them daily.

Paul Krugman's thesaurus fail was called by Princess Wordplay and offered as a topic by Twice_shy on the 13th.

Editors without an audience keep trying to enlist litfo writers, so they can steal our juju.

Someone wanted to rip off a copy of final draft and asked if anyone would enable a crime.

We didn't really seem to care about the Pulitzer Prizes... well most of us didn't. There was a little conversation and a lot of conspicuous silence. Jealousy? Or has it become less relevant?

Oh! Can't forget the weekly request for a writer to 'help' someone write the 'great idea, but is it really if I can't even write it down myself?' book (aka, I'm a stupid ass who dismisses the most important part of the writing process--will you be my second fiddle?).

Also, a whole bunch of us have migrated to Twitter. I think I like it better than craigslist. Onyxsupersonics wrote haiku tips for a few weeks and is now posting a novel online--one chapter at a time. There are also writers on Twitter who give me faith that there are more decent writers out there. We internet insurgents will clobber the lit institutions. The New Yorker has less quality reading than you'll find by clicking around the litfo web ring. You lit-cronies are laughing now--piss off: you've never earned a reader in your life--just editors. If penis pills and Aquadots can become best sellers, then consider that it is the publishing machinery which sells your book--not your talent.

And we all know I've been kicking ass daily at Toylit.

That's the news from craigslist litfo. Come on over Garrison Keillor: we'll show you how below-average you really are (and maybe waken that insecure teenager inside you--you know, the truthful part of your psyche).