Litfo Review, May 8, 2010

Litfo Review, May 8, 2010

From around April 25 to the present:

Belabored exposition and shameless self-promotion are the themes for this Litfo Review. The virtues of the churning eye of the dullard meets with the slaphappy brazenness of the egomaniac (oh, I know, we all are) makes for a shrillness I try to forget—but cannot.

Jenman8a thinks s/he can write good description. Is that what s/he means by taking three paragraphs to even hint at plot; and painfully formulaic character establishment in this comp? http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157096006

BadKytty wrote some cdickens style fake-action. Is it an act of Marysue if the author is indulging in counter-type character porn? I'm not sure, but dialogue driven compositions need to be better written than this: http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157103371

There were the typical homework help questions: Or I should say, resume help questions. I don't know, maybe the employer wants to know that you needed help writing your RESUME? http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157108707

What's up with the spiritual manifesto writers? Do they really think there's an army of comet worshipers, ready to don a purple robe & Nikes & head for Heaven's gate? http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157111072

Royo of all people had some good advice for a would-be poet, here: http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157637722 I wonder if anyone listened?

Lots of thwarted writers, thwarting themselves. Did you consider you thwart yourself because the decent side of you knows you have nothing worth committing to page? http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157123415 There are plenty of fine writers out there, the world doesn't need another shitty one. Go back to data entry. Who told you that your dreams are my responsibility?

Zenyatta keeps trying. I just can't get into her writing. Maybe someone wants to post a defense?

Man, it's painful reading just ten pages of litfo. Rename it to schizfo? Every junkie with a pen or keyboard hits it—I swear.

There's a strain of amusing homophobia on litfo. Royo can't help being drawn to such threads, but there was some guy who claimed to be a citizen of Quebec who also couldn't get buggery out of his head.

I didn't like FB's story on buzzards and I think his girlfriend thought that meant I didn't like any writing. Why do strangers assume that because I don't like them, that I don't like anyone?

Mike-in-the-box brought litfo some Bruce Sterling critique jargon. Hasn't caught on yet. We're so set in our ways.

CGT is having trouble writing outside his formula. You can't punch in w/ writing as you do with work!

I think there's a short story meeting that Swann's running. Good to have some focus on the litfo.

Playman put up a poem on litfo. Fear of nihilism is in the air: http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157846764

Short is sometimes sweet: my favorite flash fiction by Rytis was this: http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157893049

There were some earnest efforts made on litfo. I hope this guy returns w/ revisions: http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157940716

Why do so many nitwits think writing about sex is taboo? It's a fake taboo—the sex writers respond to the fake indignation of the supposedly celibate. Oh gee, yeah, nobody has ever attempted a DNA pass-off—thank god you wrote about it! Enjoy your VD infected orgasms!

GOM returned & led a Faulkner discussion. http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=157978638 Sometimes you can see the litfo in their youth, as A+ English students. Only sometimes tho.

Swann wrote a revision of an old story. Getting there hon.
http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=158146597

BowlofCherries returned to litfo. Some routines are routine in their interruption I suppose.

Oh and to continue on anal themes, someone named 'Anal T. Ruth' posted a solicitation for her crappy blog. No thanks hon. There's still some scary ho tryin' to bugger the litfo with her crusty strap-on.

Train Whistle wrote one about gold jewelry. Queens demoted to pawns! http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=158224428

That's it for now. Post any updates I forgot to mention.

Trularin Completed Another Book

Go here http://trularin.wordpress.com/ I don't think a link is on there yet, but the site should still have enough identifying info for you to find a retail outlet.

Tax Day Cllitfo Update, April 15 2010

Litfo has been more functional lately. The trolls are laughable & the writing has been decent. Today's News Flash Fiction has been rockin' the daily news and unspinning the spin. Good satire.

There were the typical kids who don't really believe they're posting on the internet--until they get their first 'unkind' comment. Then we have to watch them freak out when they're forced to deal with reality for what seems like the first time.

Zenyatta wrote some poetry that was okay in form, but not really memorable.

I don't read much wonderfulone but playman sure did and gave him/her the seal of approval. Not for me, but who wants a monolithic literary taste. Artcrime anyone?

A schizo named crimson something is trolling like it's 1994. It would be pathetic if it wasn't so ridiculous.

pdxink has grown up and can accept criticism now. There wasn't even a flamewar when spittingseasnake failed to get part of pdxink's comp on the 10th.

There was some forgettable 'chamber music' poetry that was pretty to read (for the right type I suppose) but really lacked anything memorable.

Oh, the violence-porn. Can't forget that stuff. So you know, violent fantasies, played out in a what-if scenario. Not necessarily wish-fulfillment, but the sort of morbid curiosity a child has. Not very interesting.

Oh, this guy called TheRailsplitter writes these dozen or so line poems that rhyme and use iambs, but can be summarized in five words or less. I called him on it and he tried to play it cool--ye olde, 'you loser' rebuttal. Truth hurts, eh buddy?

Royo liked someone's trite vacation poetry. That guy is the living performance art of fail. Here is some typical Royo for you:

I read the first two posts, got interested < royo > 04/11 22:07:13

then decided you are playing games
with the forum trolls, you
should try for a better audience
with a straightforward ms
unless you just want you ass kissed
by ass kissers

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/forums/?ID=155925494

Someone asked about Nu Shu, one of those matrilineal languages. China I think. Bloomsday was helpful as usual. I regret being a jerk to him/her for a few years. Goes to show that s/he's interested in talking lit, not 'making friends' as they say on reality shows.

It's well known on litfo that I'm a big fan of rtoady's writing. He really outdid himself this week with "AH-64: Ouroboros Drags His Talons Through the Dust." If you were freaked out by the wikileaks video, you weren't the only one. It's on the first page of http://carrioncall.blogspot.com and you should definitely get over your anti-blog prejudices and read it. He also has some great sketches on there--he's been doing them daily.

Paul Krugman's thesaurus fail was called by Princess Wordplay and offered as a topic by Twice_shy on the 13th.

Editors without an audience keep trying to enlist litfo writers, so they can steal our juju.

Someone wanted to rip off a copy of final draft and asked if anyone would enable a crime.

We didn't really seem to care about the Pulitzer Prizes... well most of us didn't. There was a little conversation and a lot of conspicuous silence. Jealousy? Or has it become less relevant?

Oh! Can't forget the weekly request for a writer to 'help' someone write the 'great idea, but is it really if I can't even write it down myself?' book (aka, I'm a stupid ass who dismisses the most important part of the writing process--will you be my second fiddle?).

Also, a whole bunch of us have migrated to Twitter. I think I like it better than craigslist. Onyxsupersonics wrote haiku tips for a few weeks and is now posting a novel online--one chapter at a time. There are also writers on Twitter who give me faith that there are more decent writers out there. We internet insurgents will clobber the lit institutions. The New Yorker has less quality reading than you'll find by clicking around the litfo web ring. You lit-cronies are laughing now--piss off: you've never earned a reader in your life--just editors. If penis pills and Aquadots can become best sellers, then consider that it is the publishing machinery which sells your book--not your talent.

And we all know I've been kicking ass daily at Toylit.

That's the news from craigslist litfo. Come on over Garrison Keillor: we'll show you how below-average you really are (and maybe waken that insecure teenager inside you--you know, the truthful part of your psyche).

April 10 2010: Do I have to do everything?

Perhaps you've noticed I stopped promoting cllitfo so heavily. Wondering why? Because you like hits on your sites, but you don't bother to do anything to cross promote. It's annoying. If Toylit was indicative, you were each getting 2-5 hits a day when I was actively promoting cllitfo. I asked for people to post reviews. Nothing. I asked for people to post links. Nothing. If you're not going to bother doing 1/10 the work I do to promote this site, then fuck it, right?

I'm going to promote this site a little bit to remind you all of the hits it was generating. If that doesn't motivate you to copy & paste notable pages, then this page isn't worth maintaining.

New threads, March 25-etc: if you don't start reviewing litfo posters, I will

Post links and threads here.

Also, please review litfo posts and pages. If you don't, I will. Not sure that would be preferable for some of you.

Forgot to add someone who should have been added a while ago

Please go here and read: http://anokcorralofthoughts.blogspot.com/

If you like the lyrics of Guided by Voices, you'll love this guy.

Post 'em if you've got 'em March 15-etc

New Links Go Here March 9-March 15

Anything that you think is worthy of promotion should go here.

March 1-March 8: Post your links here

Feb 28, 2010 Post Today's New Stuff/Questions here

Feb 27, 2010: Post 'em if you've got them

Fri, Feb 26,2010

Post your threads Feb 25, 2010

Feb 24, 2010 Links go here

Put up your links here, Feb 23, 2010

Post your new links here, Feb 22, 2010

Litfo Denizens who have books and other publication clips

Give everybody a heads up here so others can promote you.

Post your links here, Feb 21, 2010

And give heads up to any writing you'd like to promote.

Feb 20, 2010: Promote your writing

Identify yourself so litfo people can identify you and promote your site here, with a link.

Litfo people: you should be going to reddit, digg, propeller, mixx, whatever, and promoting posts NO MATTER WHAT. Do not use the criteria of the litfo. If you like a writer, but think s/he's having an off day, you should still promote him/her so that the writing can rise above the internet's static. Let other people determine its quality. This doesn't work if there are more people promoting their own work than the work of other writers. It costs time, but that's it. And the net result is a real readership collectively.

Ground Rules

Anybody may post comments on threads to post their writing, but this page better be used with civility. I will delete posts at my discretion, but will try to avoid using that power. This is a BBS for denizens of the litfo who feel it's improper to promote their sites on there. I will try to make sure there are new threads daily and I guess we can also do something like 'post of the day,' as a way of filtering between the sketches and the finished products for readers. In this way, this page can become a dedicated marketplace for readers and writers. Also, since it will have something like open posting, it will not be centrally organized, so if you don't like me, you don't really need to deal with me to get traffic. Grudges are not okay though, whether manifested actively or passively. I think that's it.